Just a Dream

This is a songfic, dedicated to Forestheart of MistClan. Rest in Peace. :)

By Arti

Just A Dream
It was two weeks after the day she turned 18.

'All dressed in white. '

Going to the church that night.


 * Bramblepath stiffened. The moment was so intense, so important. This could make the different in someone's day, even in their life. It was leaf-bare and everything counted.


 * She leapt forward and purred in satisfaction as she felt the vole's neck snap in her jaws. She straightened and eyed her pile of fresh-kill critically. Two shrews, a mouse, and now this vole. She scented the air, making sure no other prey remained here in Pine Forest, part of MistClan's territorty.


 * She gazed around this one area she was standing in. She'd always liked it, this clearing was treeless but the surronding trees reminded her of her mate. Forestheart. The thought of him brought a smile to Bramblepath and she decided to head back to camp.


 * Just then she scented another cat and whirled around in time to see a gray tom crashing through the trees. She unsheathed her claws and crouched, ready to pounce. Then she realized it was Flurryfoot. Flurryfoot was her daughter's mate and Forestheart's former apprentice. He was family. And the unbridled fear in his eyes unhinged Bramblepath.


 * "What is it?" she asked.


 * "It's Forestheart." gasped Flurryfoot. "He was hunting with Willowheart by the stream and-"


 * Bramblepath didn't give him a chance to finish. She was running, faster then she ever had run before.
 * Forestheart!

She had his box of letters in the passenger seat.

Six pence in her shoe...

Something borrowed, something blue.


 * As she raced through Pine Forest, Bramblepath wasn't aware of anything. Just that camp was close and so was Forestheart.


 * She had forgotten her prey. It went against everything she had been taught but it didn't matter. If Forestheart was hurt then food could wait.


 * Flurryfoot yowled for her, running after. But he wasn't close enough to stop the deputy. Branches whipped at Bramblepath's face and she felt like crying. But she refused to let herself. She was Clan deputy and she had to set an example. Besides, Forestheart would be okay. He had to be....


 * She was in the main clearing now, the place where one could get to any of the parts of MistClan's territory. The place where the enterence to MistClan's camp was.


 * Bramblepath charged into the enterance without a second thought.

And when the church doors, opened up wide

She put her veil down, trying to hide the tears....

Oh, she just couldn't believe it!


 * Bramblepath skidded into the cmap. "Forestheart! Forestheart, I'm-" she saw her mate and let out a soft whimper.


 * Willowheart, Bramblepath's grand-daughter lifted her head. Her tearstreaked fur made Bramblepath's inside's freeze over. The young she-cat called out, "Bramblepath, c'mon!"


 * Bramblepath ran over, trying to look dignified. But she couldn't quench the terror inside of her.


 * Forestheart was on his side, panting heavily. His forest green eyes were dull and it looked liked there was a hole in his side. Part of his fur was matted with blood. Bramblepath gulped.


 * "We were fishing." Willowheart said in a hushed voice. "He fell and a rock...a rock.." her sobs made it impossible for her to keep talking.


 * "We think his lungs are punctured." Bramblepath turned to see Gingersun, the Clan medicine cat come out of her den. Her eyes were hollow with grief. "He's dying."

She heard the trumpets from the military band 

And the flowers, fell out of her hand...


 * Bramblepath felt like she was fainting. The world spun around her and her heart beat fast, as if trying to escape it's impending shattering.


 * "Bramblepath...?" the weak mew made her stop. She was being silly. She turned to Forestheart. She could hear Gingersun pulling Willowheart away from the two mates and Bramblepath sent the medicine cat a silent thank you.


 * "Hey..." she crouched beside Forestheart.


 * He blinked slowly. "You look scared."


 * "I am."


 * Forestheart managed a weak grin. "I'm the one who's dying."


 * Bramblepath gulped. "And I'm the one getting left behnd."


 * His eyes burned with a sudden intensity. "Be strong. For the Clan."


 * The Clan. Which they had both given so much for. "I promise." Hot tears were starting to sting her eyes but she pushed them away.


 * His green eyes burned into hers. "I love you."


 * She pressed against him, "I love you too."


 * Bramblepath sat with him for what felt like moons. Sun high became dusk and light became dark. As the sun began to sink into the horizon, Forestheart murmered weakly. "Bramblepath?"


 * "Here." She looked into his eyes, held there by terror and love and a deep sadness.


 * "They're coming." Forestheart said. Bramblepath looked up at the stars, wondering if Forestheart was seeing them coming down, closer and closer...


 * She turned back. Forestheart's breathing was getting slower and slower. "Bye." he whispered.


 * "Bye." she whispered back, a strangled noise pushing it's way out of her mouth. She licked Forestheart's ear and bit her lip as he took one last gulp of crisp air.

'Baby why'd you leave me? Why'd you have to go?'

I was counting on forever, now I'll never know!!

I can't even breath...


 * The Clan rushed over to Forestheart. White pelts, gray, brown, tabby, tortie, ginger, blue, golden....Bramblepath stood in the midst of them all, her heart aching.


 * She thought her heart would've shattered now, that she's be incapacitated by grief. But in her mind Forestheart wasn't really gone. She was sure he'd pop up laughing or that StarClan would give him another chance.


 * Please StarClan, please....

It's like I'm looking from a distence,

Standing in the background.

Everybody's saying, He's not coming home now


 * Bramblepath was still right next to Forestheart's body, but she felt like she was standing on top of the Mist-Ledge where Whitestar made his announcements. She looked down on all of the grieving cats and, in her mind, allowed herself an anguished howl. But she had promised to be strong.


 * Whitestar appeared on the real Mist-Ledge and announced Forestheart's death to the cats who hadn't heard. The Clan continued with the Vigil. Bramblepath went to talk to her kits while other cats said their good byes. Too little time latger, she was back again facing Forestheart's body. She thought about all the things she wanted to say, everything she wanted to tell him.


 * Eventually she just gave up on trying to speak and buried her nose in his fur.

This can't be happening to me!!!

This is just a dream....


 * The night flew by and dragged on. Bramblepath didn't look up once, she stayed awake the whole night.


 * Apart of her hoped Forestheart wouold still pop up laughing and be okay.


 * Apart of her knew he was dead.


 * During the night, she allowed a few tears to streak out of her eyes and into Forestheart's cold fur. She couldn't cry in front of the Clan, she couldn't break her promise to Forestheart.


 * Please let this be some horrible nightmare!!!!

The preacher man said, let us bow our heads and pray

Lord please lift his soul, and heal this hurt.


 * In the morning, Whitestar stood on the Mist Ledge and gave his last words to Forestheart. He asked if anyone wanted to say anything before they buried Forestheart.


 * Bramblepath didn't want to say anything, she knew she'd be in danger of crying and she'd said her good byes last night. But she stood up anyways. After a few moments of talking, she sat back down and the Clan gave sympathetic murmers. Bramblepath bowed her head, barely listening.


 * She wondered if Forestheart was in StarClan yet, wondered if he was looking down on the Clan, wondering if he was thinking about them. Thinking about her.


 * I'll never stop thinking about you.

Then the congregation all stood up and sang

The saddest song....that she ever heard.


 * The Clan proceeded to go on mourning the fallen warrior. Cat after cat talked. Family, friend, everyone. Nobody had nothing to say.


 * It all blended into a sad song to Bramblepath. The last robin of green-leaf, singing before it left for leaf-fall. She wanted to put her paws over her ears, block it all out. Fall asleep and see if StarClan granted her a sweet dream, a walk with Forestheart, a last talk. But she listened to the song, concentrating on the notes, not what they meant.

Then they handed her a folded up flag,

And she held on, to all she had left of him...


 * When it was all over, Whitestar stood again. "We recognize Bramblepath and her kits in Forestheart's deah and this time of sorrow. we are ever sorry for your loss."


 * Heads turned to stare at Bramblepath and she held her head high, hoping they wouldn't see tears in her eyes or cracks in her heart.


 * "Let's bury him." Whitestar said softly.


 * Usually the Clan elders buried a cat once they had died. But because Forestheart had been such an important and beloved cat, almost every cat helped to bury him.

Oh, and what could've been!


 * Bramblepath gently lowered her mate's body into the hole under the Mist-Ledge, a place of honor to be buried. Cats contribued pawfuls of dirt to the grave until only a pawful was left. Bramblepath, who had been thinking about all the fond memories of her and her mate hadn't noticed cats leaving, one by one, until she was the last one holding a clump of dirt in her paw.


 * "Go on," Whitestar said gently when she looked at him. Bramblepath trusted her leader, so she padded forward.


 * Stop!!! a voice inside her shrieked, He'll be gone forever! Don't do it!!!

And then the guns rang one last shot

And it felt like a bullet in her heart!


 * He already IS gone forever. She told herself.


 * She lay the last clump of dirt on Forestheart's grave.


 * And her heart broke. He was truely gone now. Buried and unreachable and dead. Gone. Lost. Forever.

Baby why'd you leave me? Why'd you have to go?

I was counting on forever, now I'll never know!!

I can't even breath...


 * Bramblepath sat there. Other cats came and left. Some cats tried to talk to her. Some sat with her.


 * But she herself just sat there. Head bowed, tail curled neatly around her paws. For a day.


 * When the cool night came, she took a deep breath and padded out of camp. She padded slowly out of camp. Then she started to run. Out to the main clearing. She stopped, turning. She lost her breath and panted.


 * Down below, cats came out of their dens, called greetings to one another. Yes, Forestheart was dead, but life moved on.


 * For them anyways.

It's like I'm looking from a distence,

Standing in the background.

Everybody's saying, He's not coming home now


 * Bramblepath let out an anguished howl of pain. She fell to the ground, still staring at the camp as the image grew blurry through her tearful eyes.


 * "Why'd you leave me?" she asked softly. "Come home Forestheart..."


 * There was no answer except the blowing of the chilly leaf-bare wind. Bramblepath bowed her head and let the tears stream down her face.

This can't be happening to me!!!

This is just a dream....


 * Wake up! Bramblepath ordered herself. Wake up, go away nightmare, let it not be real, please don't let it be real!!!


 * She squeezed her eyes shut then opened them. The day was still as cruelly cold as it had been before. Forestheart was gone forever.


 * He's not coming back.

Oh....this is just a dream...


 * Bramblepath closed her eyes again and opened them to the same result. And again. And again, and again, and again.


 * Wake up, wake up, WAKE UP!!!!


 * Finally she got tired and lay down staring hollowly into camp. Her head hurt but the pain was inconsiderable compared to that of her heart.

Just a dream....


 * Forestheart.


 * Wake up.


 * Forestheart


 * Wake up.


 * Forestheart


 * Wake up.

Yeah, yeah...


 * Bramblepath stared at the sinking sun and the stars, which had once seemed to comforting, cruelly sparkled above her, taunting her.


 * Tears fell silently down her face as she stared silently at the world that was now empty to her.


 * Wake up.

Just a dream.